'How greatly your absence grieves me' - Henry VIII & Anne Boleyn: A Royal 'Romance' or a Coercive Calamity?

Was Anne Boleyn manipulate Henry VIII's feelings, or does his love letters hint towards something much darker?

“Love letters Henry wrote to Anne while she was away from court, show that she decided to treat him tough, to make him tender.” - Dr David Starkey in The Six Wives of Henry VIII (2001).

Within the depths of the Vatican archives lie seventeen remarkable letters. Written by a hand which detested letter-writing, the desperate scrawls are testament to Henry VIII’s increasing obsession with Anne Boleyn, and ofter a rare insight into one of the greatest romances in royal history.

One of the seventeen ‘love’ letters Henry VIII sent to Anne Boleyn

Although it’s impossible to date the letters, it’s obvious from their tone and contents that they were written during the height of Henry and Anne’s courtship, spanning the summer of 1527 to early 1529. The letters reveal Henry’s passionate attempts to make Anne his mistress, before transforming into a fight to make her his wife. They are full of impassioned declarations, insecurities, demands and promises, as Henry tried to woo the woman who would eventually become his second queen through the power of his pen. The language is incredibly intimate; providing an extraordinary glimpse into the heart and mind of a King who was wildly in love.

How the letters ended up in the Vatican archives is a mystery. They were most likely stolen from Anne’s possession during the chaos of Henry’s annulment from Catherine of Aragon. Unfortunately, Anne’s responses to Henry’s letters do not survive. We have no idea how she responded to Henry’s declarations of love, although it is possible to glean some insight from Henry’s writings. He often stated that he struggled to understand her meaning in previous letters, and regularly complained about the mixed signals she sent his way.

As Anne’s replies now lay silent and unheard, a void has opened over the centuries; allowing historians and filmmakers to speculate as to the tone, contents, and intentions of Anne’s responses to the King’s heartfelt pleas. Known for her feistiness, intelligence and cunning, many believed that Anne played upon Henry’s emotions to get what she wanted: the crown. Seeing an opportunity to ensnare Henry, become his queen and birth a male heir, it was widely speculated that Anne teased Henry; refusing to become his mistress, rebuffing his advances, yet ultimately tempting him into putting a ring on her finger. As Dr David Starkey declared in his documentary ‘The Six Wives of Henry VIII’, Anne played hard-to-get with Henry in order to keep him interested. Refusing to become a mistress whom he could easily discard, Anne aimed for the impossible and demanded Henry make her his wife if he wanted her body. Dr Elizabeth Norton agreed, stating that Anne was ‘thrilled’ at the effect she had upon the King; keeping him guessing and offering only moments of affection to keep Henry wanting.

Anne Boleyn

Anne is traditionally portrayed as the calculating, ambitious seductress. It’s easy to believe that she manipulated Henry’s love as a means of achieving her ambitions. Henry’s complaints about her hot and cold behaviour, combined with the loss of Anne’s responses, only deepens this belief. While some propose that Anne was in love with Henry, many others almost pity for the love-sick King who was being taunted by the woman he loved. Never mind that Henry was already married at the time of writing! Of course, Anne behaved appallingly, and Henry was the innocent victim of her manipulations. (*insert eye-roll here*).

Yet that’s not the only way to interpret Henry’s letters. Nor is it the only way to theorise the contents of Anne’s responses. A handful of historians have broken free from the traditional tale and reevaluated Henry’s letters. In their opinion, far from being the cold-hearted exploiter of Henry’s emotions, those seventeen ‘love’ letters suggest Anne was a victim of harassment and coercion. I’ve become fascinated by this argument, especially in light of my research into the MeToo movement and its impact upon some of Anne’s contemporaries. To think that Anne and Henry’s ‘romance’ was actually toxic, years before Anne stepped onto the scaffold, is utterly intriguing. Let’s explore this theory in greater depth, and please let me know your thoughts in the comments!

In her 1995 feminist retelling of the six wives of Henry VIII, Karen Lindsey was one of the first to suggest that Anne was an unwilling target of Henry’s attentions. Taking into account Henry’s grumblings about Anne’s absences from court, alongside his complaints that he had yet to hear from her regarding his previous letters, Lindsey speculates that Anne was trying to subtly reject Henry, without risking the King’s wrath. Maybe Anne initially distanced herself in the hope of putting Henry off, only to find that her lack of interest spurred him on? What a nightmare! Lindsey certainly raises the question over how much autonomy Anne actually had during her dealings with Henry. Could she really say no to her King without upsetting him?

Secondly, Lindsey refers to Anne’s refusal to allow Henry to call her his mistress and he her servant. ‘Anne had insisted that she was his servant, since he was the king and she his subject… She didn’t want to be his lady but simply his subject - she didn’t want a sexual relationship.’ Yet according to Lindsey, instead of accepting Anne’s refusal, Henry ‘kept up the pressure’ and pushed her into accepting his advances. In Lindsey’s eyes, Henry’s approach to Anne ‘would be instantly identifiable as sexual harassment.’ She tried to turn him down gently, with limited damage inflicted upon her and her family, yet Henry just would not take no for an answer. If this was the case, then for centuries Anne has been falsely branded as a temptress, when in reality she was dealing with a narcissist who didn’t respect her boundaries. And in a society where kings and men were considered social superior, both physically and morally, Anne had little chance of reprimanding Henry for his behaviour. Perhaps, once it became clear to Anne that Henry would not give up, it was actually easier for her to give into his attentions, despite not wanting to receive them in the first place?

Historian Amy Licence also supports Lindsey’s view towards Anne and Henry’s courtship. Upon reading Henry’s letters to Anne, Licence concludes that whilst Henry’s prose initially appears ‘romantic and tender’, his style and heavy bombardment of letters ‘raises the question of whether she [Anne] ultimately had a choice when it came to her relationship with the king, and her difficult position as a woman, a subject and a Boleyn’. Once again, Licence considers the possibility that Anne found herself unable to reject the King, both for familial and personal reasons.

Upon delving into Henry’s letters to Anne a little further, Licence openly describes his writings as ‘a compelling case for coercion’. It appears as if Anne never gave Henry any encouragement to pursue her, yet he continued to send people to ask after her welfare and demanded her attendance at court. As Licence states, this constant attention can actually be interpreted as ‘the gradual wearing down of a woman’s resistance.’ Even the sending of gifts to Anne at Hever would have compelled her to acknowledge him with gratitude. It’s possible that Anne could not truly escape the King no matter how hard she tried. Maybe she unwillingly found herself at the centre of England’s Great Matter, rather than propelled it into being? Due to the loss of Anne’s letters to Henry, we’ll sadly never know - but that would not stop me from questioning Anne’s true feelings towards Henry during the early years of their relationship. If my research into historical women and feminism has taught me anything, is that there are so many ways of viewing a woman’s experience - especially when they’ve been largely villainised for their supposed ‘wantonness’.

I’ve briefly analysed Henry’s letters to Anne myself, and I have to admit that you can interpret their meanings in so many ways, especially as we only have access to one side of the story. However, Henry’s references to a buck being sent to Anne as a gift in the hope that she’ll remember the hunter, makes me wonder at the possible sinister undertones. Did Anne feel hunted by Henry? Was she truly ‘thrilled’ by Henry’s obsession with her, or was she desperate to escape?

Many would argue that Anne’s subsequent determination to become Henry’s wife implies that she was a willing participant in her and Henry’s courtship. Yet I have to say that after considering Lindsey and Licence’s theories, it became possible to sense an oppressive and harassing element to Henry’s supposed ‘love’ letters. It can also be argued that neither Henry or Anne would have been aware of his potentially toxic and demanding behaviour, as their morals would have clashed against today’s values regarding dating and sexual freedom. However, although Henry and Anne may not have recognised Henry’s letters as ‘coercive’, it doesn’t mean that Anne felt the consequences of coercive behaviour during the early stages of her royal relationship. Regardless of how you perceive Henry, Anne and the love letters, I think this topic highlights the importance of questioning the traditional narrative, and allowing modern day feminist thought to influence our findings and possibly consider alternative insights into history’s great ‘romances’.